CK Lynn

It's kinda rough but I like the concept. What's with the splotch of red?

Is this about the enviroment? Believing? You start out saying one thing then go off to another.

Thanks for the crits!

I might, but I'm worried about how gallons of coffee affect your nervous system.

He'd been using a scrap of iron to file at the iron bars, but so far had little more than a nick in the metal to show for it. Alashia! ...

The first four lines werereally good, I would haves liked you to magnify on human flaws.

You know I loved you, You know you loved me too. But that can't change the things between us, no. And now it's time to let go. Don't look back, ...

I liked how the verses went from long to short. The words themselves weren't anything new, try to incorporate the meaning of your title more to make it unique.

Out of nowhere an arrow shot through the air, hitting the hairy beast between the eyes. "Elven arrows work the best when felling Rynioas," I spun around to see a ...

I especially liked the one of the boy walking into the sunset. I liked how he wasn't in the center, allowing for a second focus, the sun.

Name: Nlyssa age unknown other: evil, slightly mad, relative of a dragon Nan stared into the darkness, her face wet from the salty spray and her own tears. Each rock ...

What is this about? The first several lines seemed to be about time, but then suddenly it switched to worries about the future.

The emotions are very strong, but it would be better as flash fiction or a short story.

I think Candy is my favorite. The last one doesn't seem like Jack Sparrow, more like gypsys.

Thanks for the suggestions!